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Day 14: How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?  If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?

I think that RL and fantasy differ, for me, in content. There are some things that I fantasize about a lot but would not like to happen in real life.

My dearest fantasy, as I’ve stated before, is consensual nonconsent, or rape play. However, this fantasy is very tough to play out. An actual rape would be horrific, and I don’t wish that on myself or anyone else. But even to play at it, in a way that is convincing and arousing, is really tough to pull off.

I also often fantasize about public sex, but I would never actually do it. I can barely have sex with other people asleep in the same house, let alone be exposed in a public place where there are conscious people walking around. There’s also the consideration that people you know might spot you, and that would be something I could never live down. That’s the bad kind of humiliation. However, this is definitely the kind of porn I watch most.

Watersports turn me on in theory, but in actuality it would be smelly and messy and gross. I would readily let someone pee on me if we were already in the shower, but my logical self might be so grossed out that it would override any pleasure I got from it. I would also enjoy being forced to pee out in the yard like a dog, but that also has the same associated problems as public sex. Poor neighbors.

On the other hand, there are some things that I like in real life that I never fantasize about, like vanilla sex. Sometimes it’s a nice change of pace. But to actually orgasm, I need something quite a bit more extreme.