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Day 28: How do you dress for kink/BDSM play?  What significance does your attire have to you?

This is my collar.

A week after J and I became official, we went on a Valentine’s Day trip to a nerd convention at the college that my best friend attends. Among the many-sided dice and the Star Trek swag, there was a guy selling leather things– dice bags, renfaire gear, and conspicuously, collars. Even though I was so embarrassed I wanted to die, J bought me one that was gaudy and fit for a dog, but we forgot to try it on and it ended up being too big so we had to replace it with this one, which I like a lot better. Besides being absolutely gorgeous, it is subtle enough to pass as a regular necklace but juuust tight enough to make sure you don’t forget it’s there.

To some, a collar is as serious as a wedding ring, but not for J and I. I think at the time it was more a symbol of commitment to exploration than to each other, though now it means a lot to me. If I’m feeling insecure and J isn’t around to give me a hug and hold me up, I’ll put it on and instantly feel better. If I could sleep in it I would always have the most beautiful dreams, but I would totally die of asphyxiation. Alas.

I don’t wear it 24/7, nor often in public– I was going to wear it as often as I could, but a close friend and his other douchebag friend made fun of me for it (knowing my preferences, and referring to it a collar) and I was crushed and ashamed. And not in a good way. I don’t even wear it during play as often as I might, because its not always with me and we don’t often think to put it on. However, having that enforced would make my day. 🙂

I also have a too-short skirt that I have been spanked in, and some bondage pants that I have worn out in public, but beyond the collar and a uniform of nudity I don’t wear anything special for play.